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How to Pick an Anti-Kyriarchy Preschool, Part One: Why

Most parents, in my observation, have a hard time sending their child off to school — or anyone else’s care — for the first time. Although I have to believe it mostly a stereotype, or give up on humanity altogether, the meme of the parent  — usually a mother, of course– picking a preschool as [...]

Interesting weekend

So here’s something I’ve discovered I won’t blog about: when it’s not my story to tell. When telling of my experience would reveal more than others are ready to share.

That was my weekend. This is the first time I’ve been at my computer for more than 5 minutes since Wednesday night.

Dear Record Number of Commenters: [...]

There are no solutions in the status quo

A friend of mine, Lyla Wolfenstein, posted a link to this article on her Facebook page tonight: Mother and Child Communion: A Collective Challenge for Our Future

While I’m a fan of biologically appropriate parenting, and have been known to say that I believe in attachment theory the same way I believe in the theory of [...]

The M-word: in which I indulge in angst, whining, and more angst

So, for some reason, some o’y’all seem to like my writing. Or what I have to say. Or something about this blogging thing I do, anyway. (Don’t ask me why, I dunno either; I’m still trying to figure it out.)

And, this blog, for some reason, is getting a teeny, tiny bit Out There. Which is, [...]

Raising him purple: a defense of gender neutrality in early childhood

One of the stereotypes about feminists is that we’d have everyone raise their children completely gender-blind, ignoring and eliminating any sex-based variables that pop up, seeking to create a generation of complete androgynes, indistinguishable from each other, with equality achieved through absolute sameness.

Which is complete poppycock, of course.

Except, well, it kind of isn’t. Because I [...]

Cycle of oppression

In addition to me starting Couch to 5K (aside: not going great, level 3 appears to be cursed — not so much doing it, but arranging to do it. but I’ll get through), The Man and I have pulled out our (old, crappy, ill-fitting) bikes, bought a used trainer from Craigslist, and have started cycling. [...]

WFPP Guest Post: Talking to Strangers

This entry to the Womanist/Feminist Parenting Primer comes from Amber Strocel, who blogs about parenting, life with kids, and maternity leave at Strocel.com.

As the title implies, this post is about Amber’s struggle with first encouraging and then finding herself afraid of her daughter “talking to strangers”. She discusses her own socialization to both fear and avoid offending strangers, and neatly elucidates both how and why teaching “stranger danger” is not only ineffective but potentially dangerous.

Although she doesn’t explicitly relate her desire for “my daughter to feel confident, to be able to trust herself instead of being nice at all costs” to feminism, her reasonings and decisions are emphatically founded in womanist/feminist ideology. The patriarchy would have us — all of us, but especially women, children, and most especially girls — give up our own autonomy and healthy interdependence in favor of unfounded fear and a frightening disregard for our own feelings. Raising a child, then, to trust herself, and to trust those she feels comfortable with, is revolutionary.

Go read Daddy Dialectic

How had I not discovered Daddy Dialectic before? You all must go read it. Now. Especially, especially Jeremy Adam Smith’s answers to his own modified version of bluemilk’s What does a feminist mother look like? questions. I think I’m in love. Platonically, of course.
At the end of the day, your main task is to survive [...]

The problem with “the problem with men”

This is how feminists get a reputation for being humorless: we fail to laugh at jokes or quips that serve the kyriarchy. Like the one I heard yesterday, from D, an otherwise dear friend, spouse of my sister-in-all-but-genetics-and-law.

He and The Man were outside with the Boychick and his cousin, watching them run through the [...]

If I Twittered, this would be a Tweet

The Man with no ponytail is hardly The Man at all.

And also: It takes a lot longer than you’d think to cut through a braid. We were surprised, anyway.

(I could go on a feminist rant about how ridiculous it is that women can have almost any length hair — as long as it’s pornulated [...]