I really don’t have a problem with affiliate links, either (except that it’s usually through Amazon, which is a company I’m not wholly fond of — but do sometimes do business with still). I guess people think that you’re only recommending that book because you can get money off it? Except with pretty much everything available on Amazon, I can’t see that influence anyone’s recommendations much.

And yea, I do think there’s absolutely something gendered about money — women (in my culture at least) are pretty well socialized to give away or otherwise devalue our work, which makes me want to say bugger that, and go for the gold. But on the other hand, everything in this capitalistic society says sell sell sell for $$$, that worth is valued by money and by the products of money (stuff), which makes me want to say bugger that, and give away everything for free and stay away from the corporate world entirely.

Thus angst. There’s got to be a compromise there that doesn’t compromise away all my values. I just don’t know where it is yet.

I don’t get it.

If you (the royal you, not you specifically) ask me to recommend a breastfeeding book and I do and I include an affiliate link, I get a small percentage. If you ask me to recommend a breastfeeding book and I do and I don’t include an affiliate link, then Amazon gets ALL OF THE MONEY. So if someone objects to me using an affiliate link, to me it is like they are saying they would rather give that 6% to Amazon than give it to me. Well thanks a bunch…and don’t ask for any recommendations anymore.

Grr…sorry to use your comments as a bitching platform.

Though I also very much agree that it would be nice for society to value and acknowledge the work we do when we stay at home. It pisses me off how much lip service is paid to our children and helping the children, yet when it comes to giving money, attention, and resources, it all goes *poof*. I have often gotten into “discussions” with people over how screwed up our society is, where people get compensated so highly for things like playing a sport well or being an actor or simply being good-looking and willing to take off your clothes, yet those professions that add much more direct long-term value to society, like good teachers (or stay at home parents) get little to nothing. Our priorities are just wacko.

As for the debt, I don’t know if you’d be open to this but my step-sister has really gotten behind this guy named Dave Ramsey who has a whole program for how to get out of debt. She’s gotten my step-dad and sister onto it, too. It seems to really help people get motivated and figure out a way to get out of debt. Might be worth checking out…?

Which I realize is ridiculous and self-indulgent. Thus the indulgence in a spot of self-ridicule.

Yeah, I can get behind that kind of angst too. It’s hard not to feel like there’s a limited amount of success in the world and everyone else’s fancy accomplishments make your own statistically less likely. It’s not true, but it’s hard to avoid thinking that way.

Did I mention one of my grad school classmates is teaching at Oxford? And me, not so much… various other people I know are also writing good books, and me, not so much. And having healthy, employed spouses who like them. Me, not so much.

It’s ok to be disappointed and frustrated, but don’t let it poison you or blind you to your good people and your accomplishments.