Irritations with Blogger, and the beginnings of a comment policy

Obviously, I need a new blog host, one that will actually inform me when I get new comments, instead of only if/when it feels like it/the moon aligns/some random key generator has been met/whatever the hell it is that makes it decide to inform me today and not half the other days.

Also, I obviously need a comments policy, because this is NOT the place to say X makes anyone a “bad mom/bad parent” if X does not equal abuse and/or murder — and y’know what, even then said abuse is usually perpetuated due to having previously experienced abuse and misogyny and often occurs in conjunction with untreated or poorly treated mental illness, so let’s just skip it altogether, shall we? Again, I’m not denying that “bad moms” exist, I’m just saying that that shit is way too complicated and inevitably exists within a kyriarchal framework, actively antagonistic to women who parent, and I would much rather be focusing on the root causes of abusive parenting than assigning blame (which does absolutely nothing to help) to individual perpetrator/victim women.

And still more lessons from recent debacles, if you refer to your spouse as “wifey” (and not in an ironical reclaiming queer way), and me as “lady” (and not in a hot and/or respectful “I agree completely, my lady!” way), odds are really, really great I’m gonna delete your ass comment.

Further, this is so not the place to play protect the patriarchy through straw arguments, m’kay? It’s one thing if you don’t understand what I mean by “the patriarchy” or “the kyriarchy” or any other womanist/feminist term, want to learn more, and are asking sincere questions, but another altogether if you come in with your own, erroneous, definition, and call me misguided based on that.

And while I’m at it, let me make abundantly, explicitly clear that to the best of my ability, I will protect this place from comments that are willfully sexist, classist, racist, cissexist, transphobic, homophobic, heterosexist, ableist, sizeist, fatphobic, ageist, or in any other way exhibit fear, prejudice, or discrimination toward any other person based on an immutable or inherent characteristic about themselves — and yes, that includes bullshit arguments over whether things like fat and queerness are inherent or immutable, ’cause they are. I know I’m gonna slip up and things will slip in, either through Blogger messing up and failing to inform me such a comment has been posted, or through my own ignorance and unexamined privilege and prejudice, and so I respectfully and humbly request y’all’s assistance, and promise that when such slip ins/slip ups are pointed out to me, I will thank you, apologize, fix it, and move on.

Spam, obviously, is right out.

Within this comment policy, there is room for disagreement and debate, and ginormous room for discussion and developing our feminist discourse; there is only a dearth of room for discrimination or the defense thereof.

Comments welcome.